Well, you just don’t drink or use drugs, right? Simple enough. Even if you feel the need to take that pain pill or a swig of whiskey before work, you just don’t. In the all too simplistic words of Nancy Reagan, “Just say no.” Give yourself a pep talk when getting up in the morning, “I won’t drink or drug today.” Thus begins the battle in your mind. It doesn’t take much in an addicts head to know who is going to win that argument. We do not need an excuse to give in to the mental tug of war for drugs and alcohol, we will take the pill with a swig of whiskey.

Prior to recovery, I engaged in this mental warfare for years. I would promise myself I would control my drinking and drug use for say, the next 24 hours. Even if my drugs began to “call me” I would not give in, until I did, and I always did. My good intentions were a futile effort to control something I had no control over, literally and figuratively. For someone to tell me to just stop was a ridiculous notion. Just tell me not to breathe, that would be easier. A well meaning family member has no idea what they are asking. I tried my own controlled drinking and using, it simply doesn’t work for someone like me. My husband at the time couldn’t understand why I was unable to control my use, and he never will. He is not an addict or alcoholic. This scenario plays out in households everyday where addicts and non addicts live together.

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