Did we kill 90 civilians in Afghanistan, 60 of them children, or only five?
If it was only five, can we justify their deaths by the need to kill 25 militants, as we claimed?
The "we" in these questions refer to we Americans. We enjoy a representative form of government, meaning decisions like waging war belong to all of us. And when we decide, or let our representatives decide on our behalf, to go to war, we share the responsibility that decision carries.
If our representatives go beyond serving our interests, that's our responsibility, as well.